Commentary

 
Breathe easy and put down your credit card—you didn’t just get a speeding ticket unless, well, you did, likely after failing to talk your way out of it with your friendly neighbourhood police officer.
Yesterday, RCMP in Kelowna issued a news release stating that there’s a new scam to worry about if you happen to own a cellphone.
The scam, which has started arriving in the text messages of British Columbians, reads—with minor variations—as follows:  
BRITISH COLUMBIA FINES: Your vehicle was detected going 12 km/h over the speed limit of a school zone. To avoid license suspension and overcharge, it is imperative to pay your fine before December 04…
The RCMP news release went on to note that police don’t send speeding tickets by text in B.C. So, should you be caught for doing 120km/h in the alley behind Lord Nelson Elementary School, or road-racing past Pigeon Park in the Downtown Eastside, you’re going to either get a stern roadside lecture from the traffic fuzz, or an unpleasant surprise in the mail.
The official statement included this: “Drivers caught on automated enforcement cameras at intersections, either for speeding or running a light, are only served infractions “in person or in the mail to the registered owner” of the vehicle.”
Infraction notices are again, not sent by text. But scammers have got people across the province believing they are. And that scam has now arrived in Vancouver.
How do I know? Easy—I literally just got a text. And, in a coincidence that’s downright eerie, said text about a speeding ticket arrived by text roughly two minutes after I’d driven through a school zone on Victoria Drive.
Like any responsible citizen, I clicked the link while carefully driving with my knees, and I was immediately booted to a site that looked like B.C. Premier David Eby himself had signed off on it.
At the top, an official and beautiful-looking “British Columbia” logo, complete with a cute sunrise. Below that were the words PayBC, where, to avoid “licence suspension”, I was encouraged to enter my name, date of birth, address, postal code, email address, phone number, and credit card information.
The good news? Normally, when a traffic cop hands you a ticket for exceeding the speed limit in a school zone by 1-20 km/h, the penalty is $196. Here, I was thrilled to learn the fine was a bargain-basement $7.25 with a $5 processing fee. 
Clearly police were offering a discount because rather than standing in the cold December rain, they were using photo radar to capture amateur Mario Andrettis and East Van minivan moms who think they are Danica Patrick.
(That B.C.’s photo-radar program was scrapped 24 years ago due to widespread public outrage didn’t register with me, probably due to being thrilled with the good fortune of only owing $12.25.) 
A brief attempt to pay right then and there while driving along Broadway was made, somewhat hamstrung by the fact that I was trying to get my credit card out of my wallet while removing my ski jacket with a seatbelt half-on while eating an Egg McMuffin and watching Wildest Winter Fails clip on YouTube.
So rather than pull over, I gave up and decided to pay as soon as I got back from the liquor store, noting to put the phone down while driving through school zones. 
But first I texted home mid-commute (finally got the goddamn ski jacket off at a red light!) to warn my roommate and her kid that police are now using photo radar and the interweb to catch and ticket people speeding in Vancouver’s speed-reduced zones.
Good thing I did, because the response was this from my roommate’s kid: 
Back home after a quick stop at the liquor store to pick up four bottles of Whistler Brewing Dunkel (with chocolate and orange flavours!!), and a six-pack of Granville Island Lions Winter Ale (one can of which was shamefully downed while driving in the car), I hopped on the interweb. And sure enough, you can ignore any text that arrives reading: “BRITISH COLUMBIA FINES: Your vehicle was detected going 12 km/h over the speed limit of a school zone. To avoid licence suspension and overcharge, it is imperative to pay your fine before….”.
That text is a scam, probably designed to poach your credit card number and home-address deets, rather than your hard-earned $12.25. 
The lesson here: don’t forget to slow down in school zones, and don’t believe everything you read on text.
And remember, the only time you have to give someone your credit card is when “Melvin” or “Agnes” calls from India to remind you that the warranty on your Hewlett-Packard printer from 2004 is about to expire, and you’re going to be in deep shit if you don’t break out the Visa, Mastercard, and American Express to renew it. 
Gord Downie of the Tragically Hip once suggested that he would like to fight Mike Usinger. For which Mike Usinger didn’t blame him one bit. 
Each year I enjoy going to shop for toys for either Toy Mountain or my local Christmas Bureau….
I sat beside you in row 12 on WS704 Nov 24 6 am. Had a quick chat near end of flight. Nice chat….

source