A woman was left wondering whether she’d done something wrong by going behind her bride-to-be pal’s back and sharing with their make-up artist that she had sensitive skin
When you have sensitive skin, it can be really difficult to find make-up that won't irritate your skin, as certain products can often give you an awful reaction, meaning that you'll have to suffer the consequences of whatever you put on your face for days, if not weeks, afterward.
One woman was trying to ask her friend, who was getting married soon, what make-up she was planning on using on the bridesmaids, as she wanted to work out whether she'd be allergic to it or not. Her pal wouldn't give her the details though, assuming that only "heavy make-up" or a "shady make-up artist" would cause a bad reaction. She felt like she had to message the make-up artist herself to check, but it caused a massive issue.
She took to Reddit to ask whether she was in the wrong for "reaching out to the bride's make-up artist (MUA) behind the bride's back and almost getting the entire bridal party fired as clients?" She said that her pal, 'Rika', is "super nice and undemanding" and her main request for bridesmaids was that they had their "hair and make-up done by the same hair and make-up artist (HMUA)" which was to be paid for by the bride.
She said that her pal had a "specific HMUA that offered a fancy bridal experience with lots of extras" and they were excited for it. She wrote: "I wear bold, dramatic make-up daily. I had no issue sticking to Rika's very different preferred style for her wedding. However, over the last few years, I had a number of painful reactions to make-up products and I was never able to figure out the trigger.
"If I immediately take makeup off pain goes away in hours and discomfort fades in a few days. While reactions are rare, I now stick to specific make-up lines I know work for me. I asked Rika if she could ask the HMUA what products they use, or if I could do my own make-up while everyone else was getting theirs done (trying for the same look). But Rika just kept saying she had a reputable MUA that followed professional standards of hygiene, and that the makeup would be quite light. It seemed in her head, reactions could only happen with a shady MUA or heavy make-up."
Rika then told her pal that she'd pay for her to "have a trial done" on the same day she'd be having hers. But then she realised that "didn't work" as "if the MUA used a triggering product", she'd still have a "painful reaction, just on a different day." She tried to explain this to Rika, but she didn't understand, so she took matters into her own hands and messaged the make-up artist directly.
"Unexpectedly, the MUA straight up said she can't work on me for liability reasons as I cannot identify problem ingredients", she explained. "Not even using products I name as safe. She also asked if the bride was aware. Turns out Rika had filled out a form that confirmed no one had known makeup sensitivities. I don't blame Rika, she signs medical and customs forms without reading them. But the MUA was enraged: she almost fired Rika as a client, five weeks ahead of the wedding.
"Rika and her maid of honour have since implied I was intentionally sabotaging so I could do my usual 'attention-grabbing' make-up. I'm hoping that's MOH/ bride-stress talking and not what Rika really thinks of me. Several people told me I should've just risked it, considering my reactions (and the chance of them occurring in the first place) are relatively minor. The more people say this, the more I think maybe that IS what is expected of a friend."
She was worried that she'd been in the wrong because she'd "gone behind her back on something so important", but people were quick to point out that "addressing your medical needs directly is totally reasonable." They continued: "To be honest, I would be willing to quit the bridal party over it. You never know when a skin reaction could turn into something more serious."
Another said: "I have make-up allergies, too. Not worth the antihistamine shot if I get it wrong. I just don't wear the wretched stuff. I'd be putting my medical needs first too. Tbh [to be honest] probably wouldn't even trial it. Fortunately, all my loved ones know and as a result wouldn't expect me to wear it, even as a member of a bridal party. Not the a**hole but I can see why it'd raise questions if you routinely wear make-up."
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