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Texting was supposed to make communication easier. Instead, it has given us a whole new set of ways to misunderstand one another.
Let’s be honest. We are rapidly becoming textpendent. And that means we are using texts for conversations that go way beyond their original purpose.
Texting, also known as SMS–Short Message Service–began as a simple way to exchange short pieces of information.
Now, it is routinely used to argue, apologize, flirt, criticize and even end relationships or employment.
Its appeal is undeniable. Using text gives us time to choose our words. We can also avoid an immediate reaction and maintain a comfortable distance from the person receiving our messages.
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Australians send billions of text messages each year, with one source revealing that Vodafone customers alone tapped out 6.7 billion SMS messages last year.
It is hardly surprising, then, that our texting habits have sent a whole new digital vocabulary, or text-talk, our way.
There is no shortage of examples, although you might recognize the behaviors more readily than the words chosen to describe them.
Sexting is probably the best-known example and one that does not need any further exposure.
But if someone were to accuse you of fexting, drexting or even chexting, you probably wouldn’t know whether to laugh, cry or apologize.
For those struggling to get their heads around the huge volume of text-talk this translation is for you.
Fexting is the practice of arguing or fighting by text, drexting means texting while intoxicated and chexting involves cheating on a partner through text exchanges.
But wait, there’s more. Much, much more.
Some text-talk relates to the way people manage, mishandle or manipulate relationships.
Take breadcrumbing. It might sound like something you do before frying-up a tasty schnitzel. But it means something far less appetizing.
Breadcrumbing is the manipulative practice of sending occasional messages or other little signals to keep someone interested–all without committing to anything substantial.
Then there is ghosting, or ghost texting. It involves suddenly cutting off all messages without explanation.
And submarining describes disappearing without explanation, only to resurface much later and carry on as though nothing happened.
Some text-talk describes not what we say but how we send it.
There is double-texting, which simply means sending another message before receiving a reply to the first.
Armed with that knowledge, the meaning of triple-texting should be a no-brainer.
But the term text-bombing takes things much, much further. It involves flooding someone with messages–often before they have had a chance to respond.
Rapid-fire texting involves sending a flurry of short messages in quick succession. Wall texting means delivering one enormous block of words in a single message.
And most of us have experienced text regret at some point. It is that sinking feeling that strikes immediately after sending a message we wish we could take back, only to realize that it can’t be done.
Other expressions reveal just how much emotion we now attach to the speed, length and tone of a message.
Dry texting is a case in point. It is the habit of replying with painfully brief responses such as “OK”, “fine” or the dreaded single letter “K”.
The trouble is that nobody has agreed on the rules of texting, yet we regularly judge one another for breaking them.
Of course, text messages work perfectly well for confirming an appointment, sharing an address or letting someone know we are running late.
But they can be a complete and utter disaster when delivering criticism, resolving a disagreement, apologizing for poor behavior or discussing something deeply personal.
The lesson is simple. There are conversations that should never be squeezed into a speech bubble or conducted through a flurry of tapping thumbs.
When the subject is sensitive, the relationship is important or the possibility of misunderstanding is high, it is better to pick up the phone or speak face to face.
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